"Lost in the Noise "

 

“A Place Where Only I Exist”

Lately, I’ve been feeling like I’m carrying too much. The weight of unspoken thoughts, unanswered questions, and emotions I don’t even know how to explain—it all keeps piling up. Writing and music were once my escape. They were the only spaces where I felt truly alive, where I could pour out my soul without fear of being judged. But now, even those things that once saved me feel like they’re swallowing me whole. I’m not sure if I’m losing myself or if I’ve already lost parts of me somewhere along the way.

People look at me and think I’m okay. They see me smile, they see the work I do, and they assume everything’s fine. But inside, I’m just tired—tired of pretending, tired of being strong, tired of always holding it together when I feel like falling apart. I’ve reached a point where I don’t want to explain myself anymore. It’s exhausting when your silence is mistaken for peace, and your passion becomes your pressure. Sometimes, I just want to disappear—not forever, but for a while. Just enough to breathe without feeling like I’m drowning.

I keep dreaming of a place far away from all this noise. A place with no people, no expectations, and no voices echoing in my head. Just me. Just silence. I imagine sitting there, doing nothing, thinking nothing, simply existing without the need to perform or prove anything. That thought alone brings a kind of peace I haven’t felt in a long time. I don’t want to run away from life—I just want to find a moment in it where I can finally be at rest. A moment that belongs to me alone.

Maybe one day I’ll return to the things I love. Perhaps the music will speak to me again, and the words will flow as they once did. But for now, I want to step back and heal. I want to listen to the silence and hear what my heart has been trying to say all this time. If anyone ever feels like this, I hope they know it’s okay to pause. It’s okay to choose peace over performance. Sometimes, the most important journey is the one we take back to ourselves.

Joice😐